Kelly’s Heroes (1970)

Baffling film set in World War II. 

Clint Eastwood and Telly Savalas lead a group of American soldiers in France on a mission to retrieve a stash of Nazi gold, aided by Donald Sutherland. 

It tries to be a comedy, but isn’t funny. It completely lacks dramatic tension, too, so it can’t work as a war film either. The beginning is painfully slow. When the mission finally gets underway it improves a little but the ending is a major disappointment. 

I have no idea what the film was trying to achieve. Clint Eastwood is wasted in his part, and there’s even a fake “Western” scene added in to make the most of his popularity in that field. His 1970 haircut makes no attempt to look like it’s from the 1940s. Likewise, Donald Sutherland’s awkward, embarrassing hippy character is a deliberate anachronism. But why? Is it intended to be a subversive parody of contemporary (i.e., 1970) American culture?

There could have been a decent wartime comedy or satire in there somewhere, but director Brian G. Hutton fails to find it. 

One of the weirdest films I’ve ever seen, and not in a good way.

On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969)

After five films of Sean Connery as James Bond, George Lazenby steps in as 007 – smugly confident but not especially sparkly – for one time only.

The story gets off to a slow start with a fair bit of pottering around before the action kicks off. What is great in this film, however, is the girl Bond ends up falling for and even marrying. Unlike most of the females cast in these films, Diana Rigg is given a properly written role and a developed personality.

There are ludicrous moments, as always. The most absurd of these must be Bond walking around Blofeld’s secret base wearing a kilt and carrying a book on heraldry.

Telly Savalas is excellent as the villain: creepy but also oddly likeable. He brainwashes a bunch of young women wearing psychedelic clothes. And the action scenes – ski chase with machine guns, bobsleigh  chase, car chase in stock car race track – are exciting.

The tragic ending is so un-Bond-like that it seemed genuinely shocking.